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PAGE ELEVEN; FEATURE SERIES
DISEASE, DEGRADATION & D'ATH ....THE DOKKER'S ONE-STOP GUIDE
Putting the sin into synergy, the dreadful D’Ath -- scourge of Harley Street and Self-Appointed Flagelante-General to the entire medical profession -- brings mind, body and spirit (the latter in the form of a bottle of Gordon’s Gin) together as he takes a stroll down a different set of back alleys to the ones he usually frequents to bring us:
QUICK QUACKS & PHERAPY PHACTS
The A to Z Guide
to Alternative Health and Similar Claptrap
WHEN IT COMES TO GOOD OLE COMMONSENSE (AND NICE BREASTS,) YOU CAN'T BEAT JULIE ANDREWS. ONE THE WORLD'S GREAT PHILOSOPHERS, SHE WAS SUCH AN ELEVATED THINKER THAT DESPITE HER HOLLYWOOD BACKGROUND SHE WAS ACCEPTED INTO A SWISS CONVENT AND -- BUT FOR ACCEPTING THE ROLE OF 'MARY POPPINS' (AND WHAT A PHILOSOPHICAL MASTERPIECE THAT WAS) -- WOULD BY NOW HAVE BEEN CANONISED. WHAT WAS THE PHILOSOPHICAL LEGACY MS ANDREWS HAD TO BRING US FROM HER TIME AS A TAX EXILE HIGH IN THE SWISS ALPS OH, I KNOW. "LET'S START AT THE VERY BEGINNING . . . ."
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Acupressure....Giving It The Finger
Working on the same principles as acupuncture, but with none of that messing about with needles, acupressure is the digital alternative. Using fingers instead of needles, deep pressure is applied at the meridian points or ‘trigger points’, which unclogs the qi, and unblocks the pathways along the meridians. It is sometimes confused with the Japanese technique of shiatsu, which shares many of the same properties and principles as acupressure, but differs in that it also incorporates massage as part of treatment.
...Acupressure is much less radical than acupuncture, which is regarded by many as an effective but somewhat invasive procedure. For minor disorders, a few well chosen pokes and prods in the right place are all that is required to ease the symptoms of back pain, motion sickness and headaches. There is also much anecdotal evidence of the benefits of acupressure giving relief to the symptoms of pregnancy, preventing motion sickness and easing post-operative pain.
...Although essentially from the East, it is known that pioneering obstetrician, Sir James Simpson, the first Brit to use chloroform and ether, also used a form of acupressure to inhibit bleeding. This complicated medical technique involved putting your finger over the place where the bleeding occurred and pressing down. Yep, that should stop it.
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Acupuncture ..... Feeling a Bit of a Prick
Feeling a bit of a prick is not something anyone enjoys, but in the case of acupuncture it is the whole point. Sorry about that. So outrageous that everyone has heard of it, acupuncture can be one of the most impressive of the alternative therapies. Despite the somewhat alien philosophy and techniques involved -- or, perhaps, because of them -- acupuncture tends to be one of the first alternative therapies considered by patients in the West. Although it is not often regarded as an option in the treatment of serious and/or life-threatening conditions, it can be extremely powerful and there is much documentary evidence to support its efficacy. Usually, however, in the West, it is for relief from allergies, neuralgia, problem periods and similar relatively minor complaints that acupuncture is considered as most effective.
....In the West acupuncture is regarded as a ‘first step’ therapy and if you visit a Western acupuncturist you will certainly get the needle. In China, however, the reverse is true -- acupuncture is the final recourse. Before getting out his sewing kit, a Chinese doctor will always try herbal and other therapies. It is only when the brown potions smelling faintly of compost heaps and made from seeds that look like small ossified mammals have failed that the acupuncturist gets the needle (out.)
....Appearing in the West in the 1950’s -- largely through a series of innovative articles in that wonderful magazine ‘National Geographic’ -- acupuncture has been one of the mainstays of Chinese and Japanese medicine for thousands of years.
....The first record of acupuncture is found in the 4,700 year old Huang Di Nei Jing, which translates to the much more pronounceable ’The Yellow Emperor’s Canon of Internal Medicine.’ Said to be among the earliest of medical texts in the world, its theories on circulation, pulse and the heart were documented by Shen Nung, the father of Chinese medicine, during a time when Western medicine consisted of getting ill and dying while your friends and family looked on wailing and wringing their hands.
....Shen Nung’s findings showed that all living things possess a life essence, or qi, (pronounced ‘chee’ in the native lingo), which works in conjunction with the universal forces of Yin and Yang. Qi is the energy that comprises all of the spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical aspects of life, and flows through the body along 12 invisible pathways, or ‘meridians.’ Each pathway is associated with the major visceral organs, the connections between them ensuring that there is an even flow of Qi. A person’s health is influenced by Qi, and any imbalance, interruption, or insufficiency of it leads to illness. In such a case it is said that the Yin and Yang are out of balance. Acupuncture is applied to restore their equilibrium, tweaking, or rather jabbing the Yin-Yang scales back into balance, so that the qi flows freely once more.
....Most people know about Yin and Yang and the Yin-Yang symbol, originally worn by Taoist monks, which has become an almost universally accepted representation of the balance of positive and negative forces that play themselves out to create the world and everything in it. Although essentially correct, the West’s appreciation of the Yin-Yang theory is a gross over-simplification. They are the opposite forces of nature that work in harmony when balanced and produce disharmony when they are not.
....Yin is the female component which represents the earth, and is the dark and passive side. It is present in the visceral organs and is the absorbing principle. It is also present in even numbers and in valleys and streams. Yin is represented by the tiger, the colour orange, and a broken line. Yang, its male counterpart, is pretty much everything that Yin is Not. Yang represents the heavens, light and the active. It is regarded as penetrating and is present in odd numbers and in mountains. It is represented by the dragon, the colour azure and an unbroken line.
....The paradoxical nature of Yin and Yang is poetically illustrated in the Huang Di Nei Jing:
Yang has its root in Yin
Yin has its root in Yang.
Without Yin, Yang cannot arise.
Without Yang, Yin cannot be born.
Yin alone cannot arise; Yang alone cannot grow.
Yin and Yang are divisible but inseparable.
Got that?
....The theories of the Qi and Yin-Yang laid the basis for all the branches of traditional Chinese and Japanese medicine, and acupuncture, along with its needle-free alternative, acupressure, were just two of many medical techniques that came out of them. Indeed, the concept of Yin-Yang is at the very heart of Chinese philosophy and belief systems.
....On closer inspection, acupuncture is rather less of a therapy and more a medical art. The points at which the hair-thin needles are inserted are very precise, and with 365 acupoints across the body, it’s not just a steady hand that is required. The needles used will vary in length and material, depending on the procedure and the point of the body to be ‘needled,’ as it is called. The types of metal that the needles are made from depend on whether its the Yin or Yang that needs to be pricked back into place. The Yang element is represented by the ‘yellow’ metals, such as copper and gold with their stimulating and energising powers, while the ‘white metals’ of silver, chrome and zinc are attributed to Yin, attributed with calming and dispensing properties.
....With the needles in place, it does not stop there; the acupuncturist will, depending on the ailment, perform any number of manipulations to the needles, techniques including: Raising and Thrusting, Twirling or Rotation, combinations of Raising/Thrusting and Rotation, Plucking, Scraping (vibrations sent through the needle), and Trembling (another vibration technique.) In addition to this, some procedures may require a low frequency electric current to be applied to the needles; not exactly traditional Chinese medicine but sure to give you a bit of a buzz.
....The effectiveness of acupuncture has been seen in the treatment of many external and internal aliments, from swollen joints and nose bleeds to heart pains and spleen trouble. Routinely used in China today as an anaesthetic during surgery, Western witnesses have been stunned by how surgical operations, some usually quite painful, are carried out on fully conscious Chinese patients locally anaesthetised with acupuncture alone. Aside from its pain-killing properties, acupuncture is often the answer for those suffering from back pain, arthritis, headaches and hay fever.
....Despite on-going scepticism from Western medical practitioners, acupuncture was recognised by the World Health Organisation in the 1970s and its popularity has continued to thrive. Although many doctors recognise the effectiveness of acupuncture, it does not sit well with them that its effects are unexplainable. While a number of suggestions have been made to explain the acupuncture phenomenon, none have been adequate. One of the most plausible suggestions is that the insertion of needles into the body stimulates the production and release of natural painkilling endorphins, but that only explains one of the many effects of this strange treatment.
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Alexander Technique ..... The Art of Standing
In the alternative therapies horticultural show the Alexander Technique is the strange hybrid that is neither flower nor fruit. Of all of the alternative therapies it is one of the hardest to define and describe. Is it a physiological technique or is it deep psychology? Is it an original and penetrating idea that has been proven in practice or is it a load of claptrap that is just about plausible enough to fool a crowd of gullible ladies of ‘a certain age’ who have more money than sense and need something to bright en their drab little lives? As we are completely bemused by the whole thing we will leave the decision, dear reader, up to you.
....The Alexander Technique is certainly a turnip of a different petal. An extremely holistic treatment it aims to change maladaptive habits of co-ordination by training ‘patients’ to consciously adjust their posture and breathing. Taught -- for it is far less a treatment than a training course -- on a one-to-one basis, the Alexander Technique aims to bring the body back to the natural co-ordination it would
have if tension generating patterns of behaviour were not there to push it out of shape.
....Although it is often perceived as dealing with posture, the Alexander Technique claims to have much wider effects. Through breaking the physical habits that impede the natural co-ordination of the body and mind, the Alexander Technique is said to not only improve posture, movement and breathing but also to produce a less-stressful response to stimuli, improve sensory appreciation and feedback and have positive effects upon a number of behaviours including learning ability.
....Developed by Frederick Mattias Alexander, an Australian, at the turn of the century, the Alexander Technique was originally formulated as a method of vocal training for singers and actors. Although he was the son of a farmer in the rugged outback of Tasmania, Alexander was not at all a ‘Bruce’ and developed a passion for the theatre. After a false career start in the office of a mining company, he resolved to take to the boards as an ‘elocutionist.’ A kind of one-man pre-television variety show, an elocutionist would hold an audience spellbound as he or, sometimes, she would recite dramatic epic peoms and Shakespearean speeches. Alexander’s career, however, received a major setback when he started to suffer from hoarseness and breathing problems. Unable to solve this problem through voice therapists and doctors, Alexander thought about why this abnormal hoarseness should occur and tried to discover what he was ‘doing’ differently. This observation of his own maladjusted functioning was extrapolated into a theory of ‘inhibition.’ Diametrically opposed to the Freudian definition of inhibition as a repressed memory, Alexander used the term to describe a state of conscious observation and control. Relating physiology to psychology and back, Alexander developed a technique which allowed for a deprogramming and reprogramming of the body’s habitual patterns of thought and action.
....Still taught and practiced world wide, the Alexander Technique has had many adherants from the arts and other fields who have found it useful to gain control of their psycho-physiology. As well as many well known performing artistes from the field of theatre, music and dance, other notable Alexander Technique learners include Aldous Huxley, George Bernard Shaw and Sir Stafford Cripps. Although Alexander himself and the technique have never sat at the same table as allopathic medicine, there have been many medical men who have found it beneficial. In 1973, at the Nobel Prize awards ceremony winning scientist, Nicholaas Tinbergen, devoted half his acceptance speech to plugging the Alexander Technique
....Despite its evident success, like so many alternative therapies the Alexander Technique remains out in the cold when it comes to medical acceptance. Of all alternative therapies, the Alexander Technique is the one that stands up straight, has its shoulders well back and its chest stuck out. That, however, makes little difference.
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Aromatherapy ..... Something in The Air
Aromatherapy is the use of essential oils extracted from aromatic plants and herbs applied for their therapeutic effects on the mind and body. Smelly things have been used throughout the world since time out of mind for their effects upon mood and mentality and, less commonly, for their medical properties. It is not so surprising, therefore, that the history of aromatherapy is shrouded in conjecture and supposition. While aroma producing substances were highly prized and traded throughout the pre-Christian world as an adjunct to religion and ritual, for their flavouring properties and as cosmetics, there is little acknowledgement of their medical uses. Despite the fact that Egyptian papyri and other early texts -- from Greek to Chinese -- give precise details of the use of aromatic materials for specific illnesses, aromatherapy is relatively new to the witchipoo health forum.
....Although smells come in many forms, the basis of aromatherapy is essential oils which are extracted from a range of common and more unusual herbs and plants. The essential oils are considered to contain the essence or life force of the original product. Highly volatile and extremely potent, essential oils must be mixed with a ‘carrier’ (usually oil of almond, soya or evening primrose) or alcohol before use. Once diluted in alcohol essential oils can be used on the skin, sprayed into the air or used in an inhaler. Carrier diluted essential oils are usually used in baths, burners or massage. As essential oils are very concentrated, they should not be taken internally as this could result in a toxic overdose or acute embarrassment, depending on how much alcohol was used in the mix.
....Modern day aromatherapy was discovered in 1928, when French chemist René-Maurice Gattefosse, working in the family’s perfumier business, stuck his badly burned hand into a container of pure lavender oil. He was amazed that within a few hours, the pain and redness had gone, the burn was healed and his hand smelt like a little old lady. In 1937 he published a book about the antimicrobial effects of oils in which he coined the word 'aromatherapy' and went on to set up a business producing oils for use in fragrances and cosmetics. At around the same time another Frenchman, Albert Couvreur, published a book on the medicinal uses of essential oils. Further research and support followed. Providing aromatherapy with the scientific credibility it needed, Margaret Maury, a French biochemist, developed a unique method of applying the oils to the skin with massage.
....Although allopathic medicine has been slow to recognise and acknowledge the effectiveness of aromas, evidence of their physiological effects has been produced tracing their route to the brain’s chemo-receptors. While this research has not much aided the cause of aromatherapists, it has provided considerable grist for the mind-body connection and has even generated its own bit of pseudo-scispeak: ‘psychoimmunology.’
...Despite the newly developed therapy’s ability to treat a wide range of specific illnesses, essential oils continue to be used most commonly as mood changers. The medical effects are, however, claimed to be wide ranging. Just one of the oils, the bactricidal, anti-viral and analgesic eucalyptus is said to be effective for allergies, arthritis, asthma, athlete's foot, bronchitis, colds, coughs, cystitis, dandruff, diabetes, diarrhea, fever, fluid retention, swollen glands, headaches, hepatitis, herpes, inflammation, influenza, kidney complaints, laryngitis, low blood pressure, migraines, muscle pain and strain, neuralgia, osteoporosis, pain, phlegm, rheumatism, sciatica, sinus problems and as a healing agent on wounds. And -- from basil through herichrysum to ylang ylang -- all are said to be as multi-talented.
....It is, however, notable that aromatherapy’s greatest and most enduring claim to fame is as a line in a children’s nursery rhyme. Remember ‘A ring a ring a roses, A pocket full of posies?’ Well, the rings of roses were the circles of sores that announced another plague victim and the ‘posies’ were carried to ward off the killer germs. Unfortunately, however, the last line of the nursery rhyme has the final critique.
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