IN THE THRILLING FIRST ISSUE OF COFFEEHOUSE CULTURE
TEACH YOURSELF FREEDOM --- THE ROLE PLAYING GAME
• A Chillum on the Police Station Steps •
• The Amsterdam Experience -- Theme Park Consciousness? •
• Too Many Drugs, Too Little Time -- A Tale of Restraint •
• The Quantum Field and the Elegance of Nothing •
• Short-term Memory Loss Explained (if we can remember how) •
• Coffeehouse Conversations: The Great Philosophy Race •
• The Ar(t) of Evolution -- Going Round in Circles •
LIFE SCIENCES
•• Hands On, Head Off -- Ducking and Diving in the Real World ••
•• The Art of Dreaming and the Science of Reality ••
•• Esteem Power -- Not All Hot Air ••
•• Cultural Transitions and Wave Theory Transformations ••
•• Life is Just Another Art Form ••
•• TV Saints & Messiahs -- Capturing the Spirit of the Times ••
•• Doing, Thinking, Being -- Reductionism in Action ••
•• Mind Over . . . Oh, It Doesn't Really Matter ••
•• The Altruism of Self Indulgence ••
•• Creativity and the Quantum Field ••
THE COSMIC CASTING COUCH -- THE MATRIX & BEYOND
• Celestial Celebrities and Cosmic Cognitions •
• Living In The Presence of the Gods •
• Crazy Sadhus & Barmy Babas •
• The Mayan's Ain't Saying -- Prophecy and Profitability •
• Rig Veda or Darth Vader -- May the Force be With You •
• Back to the Future; Waiting for the Mothership •
The Alchemy of Consciousness -- Psychic Fizzing •
• Lost in the Time/Space Continuum -- It Seems to Go on for Ever •
• Visions of an Ancient Future •
• The Religion of Religion -- True Lies; False Truths •
SWITCH ON YOUR
Turn On To The
WATCH OUT
INNER LIGHT
CANNABISNESS SECTION
FOR
Bright lights
Seers, Shamen,
Sages & Saints
Ancient Wisdom & Sacred Knowledge
Flickering like an
epileptic's nightmare,
the Inner Light
Section cranks up its
power source to shine
its feeble beam on
New Worlds, Other
Dimensions and
Parallel Spheres
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
IN ISSUE ONE
MEET
THE INDIANA JONES OF CONSCIOUSNESS
AND WALK IN THE
FOOTSTEPS OF
THE GODS
The Only Bisness Section Worth a Light
Guaranteed Not to Harm Your Unborn Baby
IN THE UK:
GROWING OLD WITH
CANNABIS
Hip, Hippy, Hip Replacement

AND IN AMSTERDAM
Wheezing his way to
glory, the man whose
lungs have already
been donated to
medical research

THE COFFEEHOUSE CREEPER

ROCKY ROAD
Ice Cream, No!
I Scream, Yes!
Yes, we hit
the stony
trail(ers) again
and it's downhill all the way
Big . . . .

But remember
that low-sperm count
and the
soaring population
burden on the world.
Refer to your poor self-
image and appalling lack
of self-confidence.
Hesitate, consider,
hesitate. Too late!
Maybe you'd better
stick to the
higher path,
after all.
MORE FUN
THAN SEX
(AND
NO ONE
HAS TO
SLEEP ON

THE
COMING SOON
a spectacular non-cultural extravaganza of fun
THE OUTER SITE
It might be out of sight but it is not out of mind
But when it happens it is going to be truly
outta site
W
O
W
DAMP
PATCH)


Play
Monopoly
With
Us

FEATURING
Virtual Amsterdam
the ultimate contact buzz
so authentic, you'll think you're high
A rich and entertaining 3D virtual reality experience
that will have users coming back to the
Coffeehouse Culture site again and again

WORLD
WIDE
ACCESS
TO THE
BEST
THAT
THE
CITY OF
DREAMS
HAS TO
OFFER
WOW!
CLICK HERE TO READ OUR PROSPECTUS
AND TAKE A LOOK INTO THE FUTURE
m
&
THERE'S
MORE!!
•  Meet like-
minded people
on our
Chat Line •
• Abuse the
staff of
Coffeehouse
Culture in our
Open Forums •
• Express
your views
through
our
Vox Populi
pages •
• Take in Amsterdam's sights and sounds •
• Hang out in the best known coffeeshops •
• Visit the seed companies •
• Consult the dope experts •
• Explore the smart shops •
• Shop 'til you drop in our rip-off mall •
• Browse our archives •
• Get some cultcha in our gallery •
• Chill out in our Inner Sanctum •
• Have your tarot read or your astrology chart prepared •
• Check out the weather •
• Consult one of our interactive maps •
• Plan and book your trip using our e-commerce secure services •
• Preview the city tourist attractions •
• Get travel and tourist advice •
A TOTALLY ENGAGING AND ENTERTAINING EXPERIENCE
SO REAL YOU'LL WANT A TEE-SHIRT
Just like
in the
real
world,
in our
virtual
world
virtually
anything
is
possible.
m
TAKING THE WEB INTO THE NEW MILLENNIUM
m
ALSO
• Surf the ethereal regions and meet the disembodied with the Astral
ZOOMING INTO THE TRIVIA ZONE
Traveller -- the only diary
columnist  
who's allowed to sleep on the job

IN
ISSUE
ONE
PLUS NEWS, VIEWS, BLUES AND SHOES
In need of medical advice? Well, hard luck! Because we can only offer you our own Docker De'Ath. Our own dedicated public service unit, the good Docker has only just finished a period providing community service to rancid old ladies in need of a good wallpapering. But now he's back offering his notorious free postal breast examinations. Just send the good Docker a photograph of your breasts (or if you prefer enclose one or both breasts in a brown manilla envelope) and the Docker will write back expressing his thanks.
HOW TO WASTE
YOUR LIFE
We have all the
best tips and
tricks to ensure
complete lack of
success in
the real World
I In the Announcement, Pronouncements, Excuses & Lies Dept
Updated for the Web
Pulling up the trouser leg of eternity to pluck the hairs of
time, we explore the appalling series of cock-ups, miscal-
culations, misjudgements, misadventures and missed
appointments (with destiny) that brought us to this point
and we ask: Where Are We? And How Did We Get Here?
m
and finally
m
m
Your opportunity to alienate your friends and ruin your career.
Yes, that's right, Coffeehouse Culture is seeking contributors.
If you have something to say, knowledge to share or information
to impart, send us some copy. Likewise, if you are a graphic
artist or a web designer, let us see your work. In particular,
we are seeking static or animated cartoons and/or a
cartoonist to work to a brief.
Please use the private e-mail link, below, to get in touch.
m
m m m
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